MAIDEN VOYAGE - Day 1

It's the 11th of October 2011 and we're on our way. Yipee, Grey Nomading, here we come!

Here is our caravan (otherwise known as THE 

BEAST) packed to the rafters & ready to go. 

Ian, forthwith referred to as The CAM (The Caravan Man) spent all week (actually, to be truthful, all month) buying anything and everything one could possibly need in a caravan, which by now is fully laden with all manner of goodies. In fact the van is bulging with virtually everything a Grey Nomad's little heart could possibly desire.

On this, our first travelling day Ian has been, since the break of dawn, going through all his checklists whilst I am blissfully snoring. Although I am not always fond of Ian's Mr Pedantic alter ego, I must admit that today I am rather grateful for it as it ensures that we are able to have successful 'lift-off'. Had the preparations been left to me we'd surely lose our caravan before taking our very first turn. Hail Mr Pedandic!! We are very excited, Adventure Puss (otherwise known as Miss Kiddle – our 17 year old cat) is safely ensconced in her travel cage…and we are ready to go….

…..well, at least two of us are ready to go. Adventure Puss, however, feels otherwise. Just as soon as we turn the corner she decides that she'd rather stay at home (unfortunately a non-available option) and makes her decision known by meowing loudly. As this is not entirely unusual - she often makes a fuss when we first get her into the car - we simply ignore her complaints and cheerfully continue on our merry way. Adventure Puss isn’t to be ignored without a fight, however. No more than a couple of km’s into our journey and after a few more protesting meows we hear a telltale sound from the direction of the cat cage, an urgent sort of ssssssing sound immediately followed by the rather pungent smell of cat pee – an odor that could knock out the bravest of travellers and that has a tendency to make me just a little sick to the stomach! Not so easily deterred from our course of action we simply stop the car and take care of  Reluctant Adventure Puss’s piddle. Holding my nose shut with one hand I use the other to clean her cage and, task complete, we continue our journey - mind you, at this point we haven’t even left Hawks Nest.

Reluctant Adventure Puss, clearly distressed at her lack of success in getting her message across and by now having transformed into Resistant Adventure Puss, decides to up the ante. She begins a full-blown and rather nerve-wrecking meowing concert. Every bump in the road is greeted with yet another plaintiff cry and as the distance covered increases so does the pitiful nature of the sounds emanating from this unhappy little creature. I attempt to comfort her by talking to her soothingly. No success! I assure her that we don’t have much further to go, an immediately detected lie that sends her into an even more pitiful crying frenzy. In desperation I meow back at her, thinking that cat empathy might do the trick…but to no avail. Being of rather sensitive nature myself Reluctant, Resistant Protesting Adventure Puss’s distress by now begins to have its effect on me, my nervous costume starting to fray rather rapidly. If Grey Nomading is supposed to be fun, clearly no-one bothered to tell our cat. Each of her pitiful cries tears at my heart and I am, by now, visualising myself behind prison bars – the crime: cat torture! It’s woeful – Miss Kiddle howls , The CAM struggles to remain focused on safely dragging The Beast, my nerves feel like a bow stretched to the max in readiness for shooting an arrow…I am counting the minutes, asking every few km’s – to Ian’s great delight - “Are we there yet???”

Finally, and none too soon, we arrive at our first day’s destination - Port Macquarie. THANK GOD for small mercies, another 10 km’s would surely have landed me in the nut house. As it is I am not sure who is more exhausted by this first leg of our thankfully relatively short journey – Reluctant, Resistant, Protesting Adventure Puss or I. Poor little Tortured Puss immediately climbs into her bed, that we wisely brought along from Hawks Nest and which now lives under the foot of our bed, where she soon falls into something akin to a coma.

Ian and I, after setting up ‘house’ at a small, not very well frequented but quite pleasant Caravan Park at Port Macquarie, decide to explore its ‘thriving metropolis’. We get on our bikes and pedal along the pretty beachfront, admiring the local Macmansions on the way. Eventually we find a pub that still serves lunch at 3 pm where we decide to celebrate the more or less successful start to our Maiden Grey Nomading Journey with some food and a glass of wine.

After getting back to our van, where Miss Kiddle still lies in an exhausted coma, the stress of the last few hours combined with a glass of wine gets the better of me, I crash – equally comatose – for a couple of hours. My dream: Spending the rest of my life roaming the world in the confines of a caravan, Reluctant, Resistant, Protesting and thoroughly Tortured Adventure Puss crying every step of the way…..HELLLLLLLP!

Awakening from the nightmare I feel a little perkier. Ian, in the meantime, has enjoyed a stint of fishing and is reveling in the fact that there are no pesky clients, no deadlines to observe, no phones to answer, no computers demanding his attention … nothing much to think about other than what he should b-b-que for dinner. He is well and truly in holiday mode.

Miss Kiddle is coming alive as well. She finally finds the courage to explore the caravan. Encouraged by some familiar smells (yes, we took off our shoes) she dares to sniff here and scratch there and can even be coaxed into taking dainty nibbles of her dinner.  

And so, slowly but surely, the first day of our Grey Nomading Adventure testrun comes to an end. Having tuned in our flat-screen TV, sitting up in our comfy bed watching ‘The X-Factor’, Miss Kiddle reverts to her status of Adventure Puss. She clambers up on Ian’s lap and finally rediscovers her purr - thank goodness! After an hour or two of taking turns being stroked by Ian and myself she eventually makes herself a little nest between the two of us and happily bunkers down as we turn in for the night. What a day !!

Lessons learnt:

Don’t’s: When Grey Nomading, don’t take your cat.

Do’s: If you have no other options but to take your cat, anaesthetise her before beginning your journey.  

(For those of you who don’t know: Miss Kiddle is our beloved nearly 17year old kitty cat. She’s a tiny, gorgeous dainty little thing that came to us at 3 ½ weeks of age, has been a cherished family member ever since and has been elevated to treasured ‘baby-girl’ status since all our children have flown the coop.)